control freak

i just realised that i must be one of those control freaks, out of control. i am not able to control my own life and what do i do? i go and control other people's life.

i have my own opinions of things are others have their own. i have my way of leaving my life and others have their own. i have my own way of eating my ice cream and my own preference of flavours - double scoop of chocolate, thank you very much - and others have their own.

sometimes, i try too hard. sometimes, i do not give a damn. why do i never take the middle path, i have no idea. maybe if i had taken the middle path, things would have been very different in my life. i would probably not play so much and would probably have done much better at my studies. or maybe i should have just stuck with the hell-with-world kind of attitude and went on to do what ever makes me happy? or how about the lets worry about the everyone and everything so let me take everything slowly and hope that i never a mistake?

to say that i have no idea what i am doing or that i have no control over my actions has got to be a big fat lie. i mean is it possible that you have no idea or no control over what you do, sans when you are drunk?

hmmmm... i'm one confused person as you would have noticed. to say that i have chose to remain confused, is something which i cannot accept because how do you choose to be confuse? or is that possible?

army life must be getting to my head.